Monday, May 4, 2015
Stop it Already!
Sometimes things catch on in the whiskey industry that I just don't understand or that piss me off. The big ones, of course, are dropping age statements, reducing proof, raising prices through the roof and being dishonest about whiskey provenance, but there is more. Here are a few things I would like the industry to just stop doing.
1. Pretending a new product was an accident. Wow! we just found 500,000 barrels we had no idea existed! OMG, you got your bourbon in my rye...and it's delicious! Please stop this incessant bullshit. Try this: "Here's a new product. We hope you'll like it."
2. Using the name Stitzel-Weller if the whiskey wasn't distilled there. Sorry, but I don't care if your whiskey was aged in Stitzel-Weller barrels at the old Stitzel-Weller warehouse after Pappy himself sneezed on it. If it wasn't distilled at Stitzel-Weller, that name has no business being on your label.
3. Pretending you can speed up aging. How many times do we have to hear this before realizing it's all BS? You really want to know how to make your whiskey taste aged? Leave it in the damn barrel!
4. Calling things small batch. Can we please put a moratorium on this stupid, meaningless term. It is not legally defined so literally anything can be called a "small batch" whiskey, and it seems like nearly everything is these days. For once, I'd like to see someone label their whiskey a "large batch."
Alright folks, it's your turn. What other things would we like to see the whiskey industry stop doing?