Monday, January 25, 2016

If We Treated Other Reviews Like Whiskey Reviews

I was chatting with a friend, when our conversation turned to recent movies we had seen. He asked me, "Did you see Star Wars yet?"

"Yeah, I didn't like it that much."

"What do you mean you didn't like it?"

"It was okay, but the plot was almost the same as the original movie. I thought they could have been more creative. Plus, the acting was stiff."

"Hmm, well that doesn't really make sense, because most people really liked it. Maybe you should see it again?"

"Why would that change anything?"

"You might not have been in the right frame of mind. Did you have a cold? Were you taking any medications? Did you see anything else right before you went that might have affected your perception?"

"Um, I was feeling fine. I don't really remember what else I watched that day."

"Maybe you got a bad theater or something in the theater impacted your experience. Where were you sitting?"

"I don't know. In, like, the middle? Why does any of this matter?"

"It just doesn't make sense that you would have a different opinion from so many other viewers."

"Why not? People have different opinions of things all the time. That's why they're opinions."

"Sure, but it was either a good movie or a bad movie. An experienced viewer should be able to tell the difference. Now, did you watch it blind?"

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Did you know what movie it was before you went to see it?"

"Of course I did. How would I end up at a movie not knowing what it was?"

"Well, for your criticism to be legitimate, you really should have gone without knowing what it was so you wouldn't have any preconceptions."

"I have no idea what that even means."

"Oh, and let me guess, you ate popcorn."

"Yeah, so what."

"Well, that explains it. It sounds like your reviewing technique is pretty flawed. I assume the critics who thought it was great are the ones who are right."

"What do you mean right? It's a frickin' opinion. Why don't you see it for yourself, and then you can decide if it's good or not?"

"Oh, I already saw it."


Josh Feldman said...

You enjoy your movie however you like. If you want ice in your movie you go right ahead. It's YOUR movie. But if you put coke in your movie I'll slap it out of your hand... boorish cretin!

sku said...

I always put ice in my popcorn!

Mark said...

I don't know Sku, do you spell it Movie, or Moviey. It's important.

Anonymous said...

folks who don't like star wars obviously don't like film. they should switch to comic books. oh, wait. star wars is a comic book. never mind.

drunk said...

The movies they're making today just aren't as good as the ones they made back in the 70's.

Anonymous said...

Everyone knows before you can do a proper movie review, you have to initially see a movie while it is still fresh in the theaters, and then go back back and watch the same movie a month or two later in order to see if it has improved and gotten worse over time.

Anonymous said...

if. whiskie was a moviey, then. it woold be fantasic four, avenger


Christopher Null said...

How many movies have you even seen before this one Sku!?

A said...

Maybe they were using the wrong sized projector.

Anonymous said...

You shouldn't ever see a movie when it first opens, it needs a little air time first.

Joshua said...

Your problem Sku is that you watch a movie that was just freshly made or what I like to call a "new make" film. You need to wait 10-20 years to allow it to mature. Then the themes will be more balanced and complex.

Curt said...

I won't go to see a movie until I read the credits first.

sku said...

You all make excellent points!

Anonymous said...

And the movie poster plus trailers ALL better be clear and upfront about WHO made the movie, WHERE it was made and HOW LONG it took to make it or I will mot support the filmmakers with my money, no matter how good the movie is!

Anonymous said...

HaHaHaHaHaHa!! Good ones, all!