Dodger Blues - Stadium Eats

I'm not sure what's worse, the Dodgers or the food at Dodger Stadium. I know the team is bankrupt and game attendance is in the high dozens, but let's be honest. This is the twenty-first century. There are stadiums out there with full food courts, BBQ, local specialties and other things. And what do we get? Stadium food frozen somewhere in the mid-1970s (hey, is that Steve Garvey on the field?)

Dodger Dogs are a disgrace to the institution of baseball. These skinless wonders taste of baloney more than any hot dog worth its sodium nitrate. The newest innovation is the Doyer Dog, a Dodger Dog with nacho cheese glop on it. Are they really saying that the best way they thought they could improve Dodger Dogs was to throw congealing yellow goop on top?

The sad thing is that the Dodger Dogs are pretty much the height of cuisine at Dodger Stadium. I nearly chipped a tooth trying to bite into one of the churros. The state of these churros really should become an international incident. Costco and Disneyland can get churros right so why can't the Dodgers?

The garlic fries may be the one redeeming food at the stadium, but they're just okay.

Someone please tell me that there is some hidden window where I can get decent eats at this disgrace of a ballpark.